The Gray Pages

Senate predictions

2008-06-17T14:40:00.002-04:00

Guaranteed pick-ups
- Virginia
- New Hampshire
- New Mexico

Likely pick-ups
- Colorado
- Oregon

Possible pick-ups
- Minnesota
- Mississippi
- Alaska

I wish I could put this on one of the above lists
- Maine

Possible shockers
- North Carolina
- Kansas
- Texas

What I'm saying is this: a 60-seat majority is possible, but I don't think there's a good chance it will happen. I predict a 5-seat gain, and a Joe Lieberman addition-through-subtraction.

The Sara Chronicles

2008-04-28T11:26:00.002-04:00

We keep the radio on the oldies station fairly often -- happy music, happy baby, no Wiggles or Yanni or KidzBop or Barney the Purple Dinosaur or whatever.

Typically, when I sing along with the radio and to Sara, I insert her name somewhere in the song or somehow make it about her. This works pretty well. First of all, the word "baby" is already in about 90 percent of the songs ever recorded. Second of all, she doesn't understand what the lyrics are about (thus making it not-at-all weird when I sing "Brown-Eyed Girl" to her). ("Makin' love in the green grass behind the stadium with you, my brown-eyed girl.")

Yesterday, KC & the Sunshine Band messed me up. "Shake-shake-shake! Shake-shake-shake! Shake your baby!" This is not recommended by the Academy of Pediatrics.

Step One to the Cleveland Pennant

2008-04-15T14:34:00.003-04:00

Back on March 25, I said Cleveland would win the AL Central -- but that depended on Joe Borowski getting hurt so that his idiot manager, Eric ("The") Wedge, wouldn't use him.

Today, my dreams moved a step closer to reality, as Joe Blowoutski (get it?) was placed on the DL.

Farewell, No. 6

2008-04-08T15:39:00.001-04:00

A tired story, put to rest. Buckner is forgiven, again.

Buckner: 'It was about as emotional as it could get'

BY ART MARTONE
Journal Sports Editor

BOSTON -- Those tears he wiped away were real. Bill Buckner admitted that his suprise appearance today at Fenway Park touched him deeply, and that he was indeed teary-eyed as the fans cheered while he made his way in from left field to throw out the ceremonial first pitch.

"It was about as emotional as it could get," Buckner told a group of reporters in the Fenway Park interview room immediately after the ceremony. "A lot of things were going through my mind" as he walked in from left field. "Just good things . . . which is a good thing.

"I appreciate all the thought behind [the invitation from the Red Sox organization]. It was hard to do for me."

The emotions stemmed from the ordeal he's beeen through since committing the error in Game Six in the 1986 World Series that came, rightly or wrongly, to symbolize nearly nine decades of frustration for the Boston organization.

"I had to . . . " he began, and then he stopped for a few moments, choking up again. "I had to forgive, not the fans of Boston. In my heart, I had to forgive the media for what they put me and my family through. I've done that, gotten over that, and just thought of the positives, the happy things."

One of the reasons he views the media differently now: His daughter Christen is a television reporter, and was at Fenway covering the event herself.

"It's helped me accept you guys back into the family," he joked.

He said he understood the criticism he received for the error.

"As athletes, we know . . . going in [that failure is part of the package]," he said. "But what message do we want to send our kids? If you don't succeed, don't try?"

But he felt that the criticism, at time, was unjust.

"Some of it was over the line," he said. "The hard part was how it affected my family, my kids."

Buckner said the Red Sox contacted him about a month-and-a-half ago, asking him to part of today's ceremonies, and at first he declined.

"But I prayed about it a little bit," he said, "and now I'm glad I'm came.

"They're such a class organization," he said of the Red Sox. "They do things right, and the players appreciate it."

Nor was he really surprised at the rousing ovation he received.

"I did my best while I was here, played hard, and I know the fans appreciated that," he said. "The fans have been great. It was tough for me at first to understand the mentality of New England sports, but I did after a while and I like it. I love the passion. I don't like apathy, like in Los Angeles where the fans all leave in the seventh inning.

"My two best memories were 1990" -- when the fans gave him an ovation similar to today's when he returned to the Red Sox after 2 1/2 years away -- "and today."

He threw out the first pitch to former teammate Dwight Evans, who was delighted to see Buckner return.

"To see him walk out, I was so happy for him," said Evans. "It was emotional for me, too."

My favorite DL status

2008-04-04T13:27:00.001-04:00

"Day-to-day."

Entirely thanks to Vin Scully: "Andre Dawson has a bruised knee and is listed as day-to-day (pause). Aren't we all?"

Worst at-bat songs

2008-04-01T21:13:00.002-04:00

Top Five, Courtesy of Paste Magazine:

“Do You Really Want to Hurt Me” – Culture Club

“Songbird” – Kenny G

“The Girl From Ipanema” – Astrud Gilberto

“Tonight, I Celebrate My Love” – Peabo Bryson

“4’33’’” – John Cage

(Dis)honorable Mentions:

“Black Velvet” - Alannah Myles

“Can’t Take My Eyes Off of You” - Frankie Valli

"Come Sail Away" - Styx

“Dancing Queen” - Abba

"Escape (The Piña Colada Song)" - Rupert Holmes

"Fields of Gold" - Sting

“Fishheads” - Barnes & Barnes

“Please Don’t Go Girl” - New Kids on the Block

“Puttin’ On The Ritz” - Taco

“Theme From A Summer Place” - Percy Faith & his Orchestra

...

I'd like to nominate "Me and Mrs. Jones" as the worst song, unless Todd Jones is pitching, in which case, it's the best.

Poor kid

2008-04-01T18:32:00.001-04:00

"You know what the funny thing is? I wouldn't have caught it, anyway." -- Moises Alou

Ah, baseball

2008-04-01T09:40:00.002-04:00

- The Giants' offense is absolutely pathetic. What was that terrible Tigers' team? 2003? This team might score fewer runs than even they did.

- Welcome back, Gas Can Gagne!

- Speaking of Tigers, now THERE'S a lineup that can score some runs. Ditto Cleveland.

Early season thoughts

2008-03-31T13:17:00.002-04:00

- I think I'm going to enjoy watching the Nationals' offense. Ryan Zimmerman and Nick Johnson, batting 3-4, are a nice combo. And while I'm not all that fond of Lastings Milledge, lots of people are, and I'm hoping to be wrong about him. (I saw Milledge play horrendously against the Sox a year or two ago. Not a good fielder. And he doesn't appear to be a patient hitter. Again, I hope I'm wrong.) The starting pitching, on the other hand will probably be quite ugly.

- The shots of the Nationals' new stadium, on TV (and photos in today's Post) make it look pretty nice to me. I think the seats are a little too expensive, regardless of the quality of the team. They'll sell plenty of tickets this year though -- new ballparks always do well -- so I have no right to complain. If the ticket sells, it is not too expensive. (Hello, Fenway!)

- Will we ever reach a point in this country at which we say, "That scoreboard in center field is too big"?

- Seeing Trot Nixon accept a demotion to Arizona's AAA team made me sad. I remember Tom and I, back in college, saying that we were tired of waiting for Nixon, and if he were any good, he'd surely be in the majors by now. (Now= fall of 1996.) He turned out to be a pretty good player, remembered most for owning Roger Clemens in a couple big games and a clutch homer against Oakland in the 2003 playoffs. His Jesus-thanking position after that particular homer made me cool on him (yeah, 'cuz G-d was hoping -- and could foresee -- that the Red Sox would lose much more painfully to the Yankees a couple weeks later), as was the fact that he never did learn to hit lefties. As he bulked up, I had my suspicions about his steroid use (though he wasn't named in the Mitchell Report). Yet Nixon was the first Red Sox draft pick I can remember rooting for from his time in the minors who actually panned out into a useful Red Sox player, unlike, say, Carl Pavano or Brian Rose or Kevin Morton or Phil Plantier. So it's sad watching his career fade away, as all careers do.

- ESPN's Baseball Tonight truly sucks. I can't believe I'm supposed to listen to John Kruk, Eric Young, Steve Phillips, and that Latino guy -- Estrada? Destrada? -- and think, "He's got a point." Why the ESPN folks are so fond of the White Sox -- who, by the way, lost 90 games last year -- is utterly beyond me.

NL Predictions

2008-03-26T15:52:00.003-04:00

NL East
- Mets, Phillies, Braves, Nationals, Marlins

NL Central
- Cubs, Brewers, space, AstrosCardinalsPiratesReds

NL West
- Rockies, Diamondbacks, Dodgers, Padres, Giants

NL Wild Card
- Phillies

2008 Predictions - AL

2008-03-25T14:52:00.002-04:00

AL East:
Boston: Better pitching
New York: Built to win regular season games
Tampa: Fun, fun, fun
Toronto: Meh
Baltimore: Bor-ring

AL Central:
Cleveland: Assumes Borowski gets hurt, saving them from their manager
Detroit: Is it me, or is Dontrelle Willis overrated?
KC: Because everyone can't finish 4th
Minnesota: Because I really hate the White Sox
Chicago: Probably aren't so bad. But I'll be rooting against them.

AL West:
Anaheim: But it won't be because of Torii Hunter
Seattle: An otherwise nice team with Jose Vidro as DH deserves to be punished
Oakland: Because they have pitchers
Texas: Because they have no pitchers

AL Wild Card: Detroit

What I do, sort of

2008-03-21T11:39:00.000-04:00

Anti-Smoking Advocates Say 'Fun' Cigarettes Target Teens by WJLA.

What can happen when you put oil men in the White House

2008-03-02T13:06:00.001-05:00

See, if you're in the business of selling oil, this is not a bad thing to happen.

Enough about Farakhan.

2008-02-27T16:32:00.001-05:00

This was enough for me.

http://blog.washingtonpost.com/the-trail/2008/02/26/obamas_ohio_grilling.html

Obama:

I am member of the Unity Church of Christ, Trinity United Church of Christ, been there for 20 years. And although this is an improvement because you don't think I am Muslim, which is the other... [laughter] You know, so, slowly we are progressing here. It is a very conventional African American church. If you go to, if you were there at the church, you would be hearing gospel music and people preaching about Jesus. It is very conventional in that sense.

It is true that my pastor, Jeremiah Wright, who will be retiring this month, is somebody who on occasion can say controversial things. Most of them, by the way, are controversial directed at the African American community and calling on them [to] start reading books and turn off the TV set and engage in self-help. And he is very active in prison ministries and so forth. It is also true that he comes out of the '60s -- he is an older man. That is where he cut his teeth. That he has historically been interested in the African roots of the African American experience.

He was very active in the South Africa divestment movement, and you will recall that there was a tension that arose between the African American and the Jewish communities during that period when we were dealing with apartheid in South Africa, because Israel and South Africa had a relationship at that time. And that cause -- that was a source of tension. So there have been a couple of occasions where he made comments with relation, rooted in that. Not necessarily ones that I share. But that is the context within which he has made those comments.

He does not have a close relationship with Louis Farrakhan. Louis Farrakhan is a resident of Chicago, and as a consequence he has been active in a range of community activities, particularly around ex-offenders and dealing with them. I have been a consistent, before I go any further, a consistent denunciator of Louis Farrakhan, nobody challenges that. And what is true is that, recently this is probably, I guess last year. An award was given to Farrakhan for his work on behalf of ex-offenders completely unrelated to his controversial statements. And I believe that was a mistake and showed a lack of sensitivity to the Jewish community, and I said so. But I have never heard an anti-Semitic [remark] made inside of our church. I have never heard anything that would suggest anti-Semitism on part of the pastor.

He is like an old uncle who sometimes will say things that I don't agree with. And I suspect there are some of the people in this room who have heard relatives say some things that they don't agree with. Including, on occasion, directed at African Americans that maybe a possibility that's just -- I am not suggesting that's definitive. So the point I make is this, that I understand the concerns and the sensitivities, and one of my goals constantly in my public career has been to try to bridge what was a historically powerful bond between the African American and Jewish communities that has been frayed in recent years. For a whole variety of reasons. I think that I have served as an effective bridge, and that's the reason I have overwhelming support among the Jewish community that knows me best, which is the Jewish community in Chicago . And I think that anybody who has friends among the Jewish community in Chicago should check out those credentials.

But I do appreciate the opportunity to clarify those concerns. And as I said, that last point I would make is that you know my pastor is going to be retiring over the next month. So my general view, and the reason that I raise this, this is always a sensitive point, what you don't want to do is distance yourself or kick somebody away, because you are now running for president and you are worried about perceptions, particularly when someone is basically winding down their life and their career.

Douchebag

2008-02-26T14:30:00.000-05:00

Hal McCoy:
It was in the 1980s after Clemens, pitching for Boston, struck out 20 Seattle Mariners. My paper sent me to Boston to do a piece on Clemens, who, after all, was born in Dayton ... He told me to meet him in the dugout before he did his daily run around the park. The interview lasted 12 minutes and was conducted while he laced on his shoes.

And the only thing to come out of the interview worth anything was Clemens’ quote about his hometown: “The best thing about Dayton was seeing it in the rear-view mirror.”

Best Picture Winners: Seen and Unseen

2008-02-26T12:06:00.004-05:00

Apologies for the stupid format of this list -- it took me a little while to find a cut-and-paste-able list that listed only the winners.

Here are the ones I've seen:

Oscar Winners for Best Picture: 2000 - The Present
78th Annual Academy Awards - Crash
77th Annual Academy Awards - Million Dollar Baby
75th Annual Academy Awards - Chicago
73rd Annual Academy Awards - Gladiator
72nd Annual Academy Awards - American Beauty

Oscar Winners for Best Picture: 1990 - 1999
71st Annual Academy Awards - Shakespeare in Love
70th Annual Academy Awards - Titanic
68th Annual Academy Awards - Braveheart
67th Annual Academy Awards - Forrest Gump
66th Annual Academy Awards - Schindler's List
65th Annual Academy Awards - Unforgiven
63rd Annual Academy Awards - Dances With Wolves

Oscar Winners for Best Picture: 1980 - 1989
61st Annual Academy Awards - Rain Man
60th Annual Academy Awards - The Last Emperor
57th Annual Academy Awards - Amadeus*
55th Annual Academy Awards - Gandhi*
54th Annual Academy Awards - Chariots of Fire*

* I was really young, and these movies made no impression on me whatsoever. Well, other than a vague memory of Gandhi getting shot and the theme song to "Chariots," which -- along with "Music Box Dancer" -- was my favorite song when I was, like, 5. Sue me.

Oscar Winners for Best Picture: 1970 - 1979
50th Annual Academy Awards - Annie Hall
47th Annual Academy Awards - The Godfather, Part II
46th Annual Academy Awards - The Sting
45th Annual Academy Awards - The Godfather
43rd Annual Academy Awards - Patton

Oscar Winners for Best Picture: 1960 - 1969
41st Annual Academy Awards - Oliver!
40th Annual Academy Awards - In the Heat of the Night
38th Annual Academy Awards - The Sound of Music
34th Annual Academy Awards - West Side Story

Oscar Winners for Best Picture: 1950 - 1959
30th Annual Academy Awards - The Bridge on the River Kwai
27th Annual Academy Awards - On the Waterfront

What does this mean? Here are some of the movies that I've never seen, causing you to say, "Wait! You've never seen [blank]?! How is that even possible?"

A Beautiful Mind, The English Patient, The Silence of the Lambs, Driving Miss Daisy, Platoon, The Deer Hunter, Rocky, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Lawrence of Arabia, Ben-Hur, From Here to Eternity, All the King's Men, Casablanca, and Gone with the Wind.

G-d Bless You, Henry Waxman

2008-02-25T17:24:00.003-05:00

My fellow Americans: as a young boy, I dreamed of being a baseball. But tonight I say, we must move forward, not backward, upward, not forward. And always twirling, twirling, twirling towards freedom! -- Kodos

You know, my bitterness about baseball-related things has receded to a remarkable degree since 2004. (For those of you who doubt this, you may be surprised to hear I used to keep a lot of that bitterness to myself.) And so, you might think that I'd be ready to forgive and forget Roger Clemens for generally being a douchebag who could never beat Dave Stewart or win any other big games while with the Sox. But you'd be wrong.

Headlines like this one are good for my heart.

Patriotism

2008-02-17T09:21:00.002-05:00

The Globe reports that illegal immigrants are probably paying federal income taxes more than ever. Why?

"While typical American taxpayers are wary of the Internal Revenue Service, illegal immigrants see the IRS as a friendly agency that could help in their quest for legal residency."

10 percent

2008-02-14T14:13:00.002-05:00

How I voted.

And, yes, watching Roger Clemens's public humiliation is the best end to his career I can imagine other than 38,000 at Fenway pelting him with Marge Simpson's pretzels.

DC Grays: Endorsing the separation of church from me since 1975

2008-02-06T16:43:00.000-05:00

Posted without comment.

Plan B

2008-02-05T16:09:00.000-05:00

I was going to make a post mocking the NJ Giants for holding their victory parade 100 miles away in downtown Manhattan, but it turns out East Rutherford is actually pretty close to NYC. So, never mind. (It looks to me like East Rutherford is closer to NYC than Foxborough is to Boston.) (Incidentally, I think football stadiums should be in the suburbs, since they're only used a handful of days each year and would never support auxiliary businesses like bars and restaurants. Commuter parking? Yes. The Cask n' Flagon? For eight home games a year, ten if you're good? No. Urban land should benefit residents. But I digress.)

But can anyone figure out what was actually taking place at the Meadowlands when this satellite photo was taken? I mean, it's lined for soccer, I get that. But why were they letting so many people onto the field? And why are the stands empty?

What lying about a war looks like in graph form

2008-02-04T17:24:00.001-05:00

The view from the bandwagon

2008-02-04T09:54:00.000-05:00

Me: Todd Light is getting killed out there. He's just playing awful.
Stu: Matt Light.
Me: Who?
Stu: Matt Light. His name is Matt Light.
Me: Oh. Who's Todd Light, then?
Stu: I don't know.

And yet, I have to admit I'm pretty disappointed today.

Good move by Bob Kraft

2008-01-16T16:57:00.000-05:00

Patriots to honor young fan booed in Indianapolis

I was also excited to see that Andre Tippett is employed by the team. That guy was awesome.

Thank Wegman's

2008-01-16T13:36:00.000-05:00

For their great produce selection, for their terrific generic marinara sauce, and for this.

Take that, play clock

2008-01-14T09:33:00.000-05:00

So, Brandon Jacobs scores a TD. He's all hopped up, ready to ... do something! He's pounding the ball in his hands.

Runs out the past of the endzone ... ooh, he's gonna slam the ball into a sign that says "Eli Sux" or a Cowboys logo. Around the Horn will talk about it for the next 6 days. Joe Buck will call it a disgusting act.

This is gonna be great!

And he slams it into the play clock.

Take THAT, play clock!

Take that, Mercury Morris

2008-01-13T19:18:00.000-05:00

Are the Packers the only good team in the NFL that the Patriots haven't beaten? There's 6 playoff teams per conference. The Patriots are, of course, one of those.

Of the other 11 -- the Jaguars, Titans, Colts, Steelers, Chargers in the AFC, the Cowboys, Giants, Redskins, Packers Bucs and Seahawks in the NFC -- the Patriots have, remarkably, had to play all but Tennessee, Green Bay, Tampa Bay, and Seattle. (And, let's face it, Tennessee and Tampa Bay really weren't very good.) They also had to play the Eagles, who were pretty good but unlucky enough to play in the best NFC division, and the Browns, who were probably better than the Titans anyway but had a tough division schedule, too. (I guess the TOUGHEST schedule would have been if a team in the AFC South or maybe North had to play out-of-conference against the NFC East. But, really, the Bills weren't a bad team. The Jets and Dolphins I have no excuses for.)

Is there any reason to think that they can be stopped? Well, yes: the refs certainly tried to give the SD-Indy game to the Colts. That game was nearly a travesty, and the officials need to be investigated for whether they have consorted with gamblers and if they, themselves, had money on the game. Just because the right team won doesn't mean that the discussion should end.

Me

2008-01-11T16:01:00.000-05:00

I think it's surprising that I've never ranted about the NFL replay rules on this page.

Hard to believe all those teams screwed up the draft

2008-01-10T13:50:00.000-05:00

Is it possible that the NFL scouting combines measure the wrong things?

Naaah. It's very important to know (photo 4) how quickly a quarterback runs straight ahead (out of a starting-blocks position, no less) for 40 yards in a t-shirt and shorts. Also, you want your QB to look good with his shirt off (photo 1).

Do they give extra points to the team whose QB has the best abs?

Five feet, seven inches

2008-01-09T16:38:00.000-05:00

Boy, Dennis Kucinich sure is short. No one this short could be president.

New Hampshire

2008-01-08T11:56:00.000-05:00

Thanks to the Almanac of American Politics:

In the 2006 Edition, the New Hampshire Senate was filled by 16 Republicans and 8 Democrats. Two years later, there's 14 Democrats and 10 Republicans. Six out of 24 seats flipped, a quarter.

In the 2006 Edition, the New Hampshire House was filled by 253 Republicans and 147 Democrats. Two years later, there's 239 Democrats and 161 Republicans. Ninety-two out of 400 seats flipped, slightly less than a quarter.

Nationally in the 2006 election, the Democrats did very nicely picking up 30 House seats and 6 Senate seats, which is about 6 percent of each body. Two of those seats were in New Hampshire. New Hampshire has two Congressman.

Call me crazy, but I don't think New Hampshire independents are going to vote for McCain. New Hampshire independents don't like Republicans very much.

NFL Predictions

2008-01-05T16:08:00.000-05:00

Was def. Sea
Jax def. Pit
TB def. NYG
SD def. Ten

My campaign speech for the Democratic nomination

2008-01-04T11:25:00.000-05:00

In this time of transition, we need to change the tone in Washington. And that's why we need to unite behind a message of change.

I am the candidate best prepared to transition that change. And why is change so important? Because unless we have change, we will be stuck in the past with the same old ideas that got us into this mess that I like to call, 'the status quo.'

Change change change.

Change.

We don't need a bunch of pollsters and Washington insiders change telling us change is what's needed, change. Not when change we have seen with our own change how changey and change-a-rific change can be. When we open our hearts to a new type of change, only then can we bring about change in Washington.

Thank you.

Score one for the good guys

2008-01-04T11:18:00.000-05:00

Wegmans to stop selling cigarettes and tobacco
Matt Glynn - News Business Reporter

Wegmans has announced it will stop selling cigarettes and other tobacco products in its supermarkets effective Feb. 10.

Until Feb. 10, only remaining inventory of those products will be available for sale in its stores. The chain will not order new tobacco products between now and then.

Signs will be posted in Wegmans stores announcing the policy change.

Wegmans operates 71 stores: 49 in New York State, 12 in Pennsylvania, 7 in New Jersey, 2 in Virginia and one in Maryland. Wegmans has $4.1 billion in sales in 2006 and employs over 36,000 people.

http://marmadukeexplained.blogspot.com/

2008-01-03T15:08:00.000-05:00

http://marmadukeexplained.blogspot.com/

Iowa predictions

2008-01-02T10:54:00.001-05:00

Democrats
1. Obama, 37 percent
2. Edwards, 28 percent
3. Clinton, 25 percent
4. Dodd, 5 percent
5. Richardson, 3 percent
6. Biden, 2 percent

Insane Clown Posse
1. Huckabee, 46 percent
2. Romney, 20 percent
3. Thompson, 14 percent
4. McCain, 10 percent
5. Guiliani, 8 percent
6. Paul, 2 percent

It's a big country

2007-12-19T10:46:00.000-05:00

The GOP primaries have reminded me how poorly I fit in with that party. Every time a Republican has said something I find reasonable -- that its immoral to punish children of illegal immigrants (Huckabee and McCain), that some gun control is sensible (Guiliani), that states can help poor people buy health insurance (Romney), that Bush lied us into Iraq (Paul), it's derided as out of the Republican mainstream, and a potential weakness. Romney just put out an ad bragging that he didn't commute a single jail sentence as governor or pardon anyone.

This just in: I'm not a Republican.

A Pure Life

2007-12-13T17:09:00.000-05:00

As a Christian I also have one goal. I want to fulfill God's purpose for my life. I constantly ask myself "What does God want me to do?" and "Where does He want me to go?" Those may sound like odd questions to ask in a book about purity. After all, doesn't purity just mean sexual purity? Hardly. As I said in the last chapter, living a pure life means trying to please God in everything I do. And the best way to please God is living in a way He can work through me and use me in other people's lives.

Guess.

C'mon.

Guess.

Okay, fine.

Click here.

425,171 points

2007-12-12T12:44:00.000-05:00

Travel game.

George Steinbrenner's grandson

2007-12-05T16:52:00.000-05:00

Is named George Michael.

Favorite bagels by decade

2007-12-05T12:08:00.000-05:00

1980s: Raisin, pumpernickel

1990s: Plain, Raisin, Onion

2000s: Sesame seed, pumpernickel, blueberry, raisin

Wow

2007-12-04T16:28:00.001-05:00

I just had to tell a coworkers who Pete Rose is.

Great moments in parenting

2007-12-03T09:37:00.000-05:00

Humming a song to yourself, wondering what tune is stuck in your head, and realizing it's "Do your ears hang low?"

(Did anyone know that there's more than one verse?)

(And isn't it a little odd that NIH has a page with those lyrics on it? Is the National Institutes of Health diagnosing ear problems? Because if, indeed, you can tie your ears in a bow, you've got problems that the best researchers at NIH really ought to be looking into.)

87 long years

2007-11-29T16:37:00.001-05:00

"Eighty-seven long years. We waited 87 long years. And true suffering Red Sox fans that my family and I are, we could not have been more happy than to see the Red Sox win the World Series." -- Mitt Romney

It was 86. But that's not my point.

I'm just curious when the son of the Michigan governor became a Red Sox fan. Or his wife, who was also born in Michigan. Here's other parts of his bio (edited without ellipses), if Wikipedia can be trusted:

Mitt Romney graduated from the Cranbrook School in Bloomfield Hills, Michigan. After attending Stanford University for two quarters, Romney served in France for 30 months as a missionary. After his mission service Romney began attending Brigham Young University, earning his B.A. summa cum laude in 1971. [He was 24.] In 1975, Romney graduated from a joint JD/MBA program coordinated between Harvard Law School and Harvard Business School.

Okay, so sometime in his mid-20s, he moved to Massachusetts and became a Red Sox fan. I started being a Red Sox in 1975, too, so maybe I shouldn't be so doubtful.

No way! An articulate candidate is black?

2007-11-27T17:59:00.000-05:00

... from Congress Daily, reprinted without permission:

Georgia. A former aide to Rep. Jack Kingston, R-Ga., is considering running for the seat held by Democratic Rep. John Barrow, the Savannah Morning News reported. "I'm more in it than out," said Karen Bogans, a government and community affairs consultant. She added that a final decision would come by year's end. Kingston praised Bogans. "I would lean toward endorsing her," he said. "She's a hard worker, very knowledgeable, very presentable and very articulate."

Bogans, who is black, said she was aware of the district's significant black population. "I believe that the African-American community is a lot more conservative than people give them credit for," she said. Barrow narrowly won re-election last year. The Republican field includes Chris Edenfield and mechanical engineer Ray McKinney. Iraq war veteran Wayne Mosley and former Augusta Mayor Bob Young have been mentioned as possible candidates.

GOP-redictions

2007-11-27T17:19:00.000-05:00

I was just looking at my old predictions, preparing to gloat about how I've predicted great things for Huckabee. Turns out, I actually listed him as winning the GOP nomination. Well, I'm not about to go that far. Here's how I see things playing out:

1. Huckabee wins Iowa, Romney second.
Because the earth is only 10 thousand years old.

2. McCain wins New Hampshire, Guiliani second, McCain third, Ron Paul fourth.
I thought McCain was dead a few months ago. So I've flipped on that. But here's the thing: Huckabee doesn't have any money to keep his Iowa-mentum going. Though he should do pretty well in South Carolina.

3. Huckabee wins South Carolina. Fred Thompson finishes second, McCain third. Romney is in free-fall from the disappointing Iowa and New Hampshire finishes. The evangelicals in the South refuse to vote for a Mormon. He drops out after this one.

So, who's left? After the early primaries? Huckabee, McCain, Guiliani, and Thompson. Guiliani, despite winning nothing, is in good shape because of the delegate-rich contests in California and New York (along with the Republicans' pathetic winner-take-all rules). But if one candidate -- and only one -- can hang around after New York and Califoria and whatever other early states happen -- Michigan and Florida, I believe -- then the anti-Guiliani vote amasses around that candidate.

Your 2008 Republican Nominee? Fred Thompson. Seriously.

And so does a political party and movement shrink into oblivion

2007-11-19T09:54:00.001-05:00

I've been watching a terrific NOVA episode, "Judgment Day: Intelligent Design on Trial." It's about the court case wherein the school board's policy in Dover, Penn., cast doubt on Darwinian evolutionary theory. I'm feeling much smarter and more informed on biology and genetics than I was a few days ago before I started watching. (Keep in mind, I watch this thing in 12-minute increments. Not that I'm complaining.) But it's had an impact on how I'm viewing the world these days.

Take this article from CQ, in which I learned that "last month, redstate.com (a conservative blog) barred newly registered users from writing any pro-[Ron] Paul commentary on the site. 'Effective immediately, new users may not shill for Ron Paul in any way shape, form or fashion. Not in comments, not in diaries, nada,' wrote Leon Wolf, a senior editor for the Web site."

Evolve or die, Republicans. No one, in this space, will mourn your death.

I know whose side I'm on

2007-11-16T17:24:00.000-05:00

Don't-tax-and-spend

2007-11-16T09:34:00.000-05:00

Just spend.

How did Republicans get a reputation as the party of fiscal sanity? Thank G-d Diebold wasn't able to fix another election or we'd really be in trouble.

"Misleading investors is a federal crime"

2007-11-15T15:25:00.001-05:00

Good stuff from the good guys:

Our new website

2007-11-15T14:47:00.000-05:00

http://www.cancerno9.com/

Thanks

2007-11-13T11:09:00.000-05:00

Just surfing around, and landed on the Sporting News's baseball page. Currently, under "Member quote showcase" is this gem:

"Like him, hate him, whatever, Alex Rodriguez is a fabulous ballplayer."

So decrees unbelieveable24. Emphasis in original.

Overheard at Forest Glen Metro, Monday 6:45 pm

2007-11-13T09:06:00.000-05:00

Man listening to Ipod: I didn't see you there. I was engrossed in Terry Gross.*
Other man: Oh, you like Terry Gross?

It's been 15 hours, and I'm still trying to decided which sentence is dumber.

*Link provided for those who don't know who she is, reasonably enough

Why?

2007-11-06T16:47:00.000-05:00

What would possess someone to do this?

38 pitches

2007-11-06T13:32:00.000-05:00

Now the only thing that’s left is this…

SIGN MIKE LOWELL!!!!!

S-M-R-T

2007-10-30T15:48:00.000-04:00

AEI wonders -- as does the rest of the world -- why am I so smart?

"If you were dumb and a Jew, it was a lot easier to be a Christian," notes Charles Murray.

This isn't quite right. If you're a dumb Jew, you join AEI or write for Bill Kristol's magazines.

Terrific dumb things I once said

2007-10-29T16:27:00.000-04:00

"Mike Lowell is the tax on Josh Beckett."

We'll miss you, too.

2007-10-26T11:24:00.000-04:00

"Rust"

2007-10-25T13:30:00.000-04:00

The better team won last night, but I've already read plenty of excuse-making from the likes of Tom Boswell to see that the Rockies have been given an all-in-one excuse for losing: rust. (Incidentally, I haven't seen this excuse from the players themselves.)

Look, I don't like this schedule better than anyone else does. Baseball is an every day sport, and MLB has messed up not only the rhythm of multiple series (and caused me to question what the plural of series is) (and whether the singular form of the word is 'serie' or perhaps 'sery') but rewarded teams with shallower rosters. Fourth and fifth starters are far less important when a team can -- CAN -- pitch Josh Beckett or Jeff Francis in Games One, Four and Seven.

As far as the Rockies' rust: they knew that the Series was going to start last night, right? They knew this months ago. They certainly knew it when they clinched their first National League pennant. If the team was, indeed, rusty, then maybe it's their own fault. Jeff Francis could have pitched one of them "simulated games" that are all the rage. Batters could have taken extra batting practice. They could have scrimmaged against the University of Northern Colorado Bears and their wicked cool logo. They could have done lots of things.

But the fact is, even once Francis knocked whatever rust he may have accumulated off, even once the Rockies' batters had a couple at bats, the game didn't change one iota. The blowout inning was the 5th, the point at which "rust" should have worn off. The Sox scored off Francis in all but one inning he appeared.

Boston 1, Colorado 0.

Rockie thoughts

2007-10-24T17:05:00.000-04:00

1. Willy Taveras, CF
2. Kazuo Matsui, 2B
3. Matt Holliday, LF
4. Todd Helton, 1B
5. Garrett Atkins, 3B
6. Brad Hawpe, RF
7. Troy Tulowitzki, SS
8. Yorvit Torreabla, C
9. Ryan Spillborghs, DH

Holliday, Helton, and Hawpe are awful good against righties. Tulowitzki loses a lot of his magic against them. The key to Game One, from Beckett's perspective, is keeping Taveras and Matsui off the bases so that Holliday and Helton don't have as many RBI chances.

The bottom third of that batting order isn't scaring anyone. Then again, neither does ... checking the Sox' lineup .... wait! JD Drew is batting 7th? Against a lefty? Isn't this why we got that redhead? Whathisname? And Tek is batting 6th?

I'll say this: Whenever JD, Jacobi and Julio Lugo get on, should be running on the second pitch.

Prediction: Red Sox 6, Colorado 1. Seven innings from Beckett, one from Okajima, one from Papelbon. Right-handed bats at the top of the order do most of the damage; Ortiz walks 3 times; Manny homers. Beckett=Beckett.

"Temporary Red Sox loyalty"

2007-10-23T15:21:00.000-04:00

Amazingly enough, a story that isn't about Mitt Romney:

Yankee Fan [sic] Giuliani Backing Red Sox

Sounds like a baseball flip-flop. Rudy Giuliani, a lifelong New York Yankees fan [sic], said Tuesday he's pulling for their most hated rivals, the Boston Red Sox, to win the World Series over the Colorado Rockies.

"I'm rooting for the Red Sox," the Republican presidential contender said in response to a question, sparking applause at the Boston restaurant where he was picking up a local endorsement.

"I'm an American League fan, and I go with the American League team, maybe with the exception of the Mets," he said. "Maybe that would be the one time I wouldn't because I'm loyal to New York [sic]."

Giuliani's Yankees [sic] lost in the first round of the playoffs, then lost their manager when Giuliani's friend, Joe Torre, refused to accept a pay cut and walked away. Giuliani said the Yankees had "a great season."

The former New York mayor said his declaration of temporary Red Sox loyalty was "not just because I'm here in Massachusetts."

"In Colorado, in the next week or two, you will see, I will have the courage [sic] to tell the people of Colorado the same thing, that I am rooting for the Red Sox in the World Series," he said.

Indeed, if Giuliani was pandering, he miscalculated.

In the last presidential election, Colorado went with Republican President Bush, and recent history shows Massachusetts voters would sooner adopt Manhattan clam chowder [sic] as the state's official food than vote Republican in 2008.

Of course, just to the north is New Hampshire -- home to many Red Sox fans -- and the nation's first primary.

Things I didn't know about the Rockies

2007-10-22T15:56:00.000-04:00

The beginning of a 300-part series.

1. Willy Taveras is only 25 years old.
2. Willy Taveras's real first name is apparently Willy.
3. Not William.
4. Not Wilfredo.

Things I don't need to hear

2007-10-22T15:43:00.000-04:00

1. "Matt Holliday still hasn't touched home plate."
Look, if Hollday was called out, the game is tied with two outs in the bottom of the 13th. The bases would have been empty, and Brad Hawpe (who I keep wanting to call "Brian") would have been up to bat. Home crowd, and Trevor Hoffman had NOTHING. I'm not saying that Hawpe is in any way guaranteed to hit a homer (or double, or walk, or any other outcome). But Hoffman had already thrown 19 pitches, just ten of them for strikes. I'll guess there's a three-to-one chance that Colorado would have won eventually. At least.

This whole thing reminds me of the strange myth that Buckner cost the Red Sox Game Six. If Buckner fields that ball, Mookie Wilson beats him to first base, then there are runners at the corners in a tie game. I'll guarantee that THAT game would have ended one batter later on a passed ball or wild pitch. (Is it possible that I dislike Ray Knight as an announcer because he scored the winning run? Yes, yes it is.)

But the key thing was, the game was TIED. Even if Buckner, playing off the line makes the play himself (Bob Stanley wasn't covering first) (good job, Steamer!) against all logic, the game goes to the 11th inning. And the Sox lose it there.

I'm not claiming any moral equivalency here, but a bad call did not win that game for the Rockies. Good hitting and a rare off-day from Hoffman did.

11:27 in the East

2007-10-21T23:27:00.000-04:00

And Joe Buck just started a sentence with, "If you're just joining us ..."

Why

2007-10-21T23:07:00.001-04:00

Why is the score always 5-2?

"Just like the Yankees"

2007-10-21T23:02:00.000-04:00

Whenever someone says that the Red Sox have turned into the Yankees, I'll remember the 7th inning of the 7th game of the 2007 ALCS, when cheap reliever Okajima saved the game, rookie call-up Ellsbury reached second on a hard-hit grounder, and rookie second baseman Pedroia hit a 2-run homer.

Yep, just like the Yankees.

This series is not over

2007-10-17T15:11:00.000-04:00

Beckett starts Game Five, so I like our chances there.

And, despite his outing in Game Two, I'd never bet against Curt Schilling in a big game, particularly when his Red Sox career is on the line at Fenway.

So then it's Game Seven, and weird things happen in Games numbered Seven. Jeff Suppan. Aaron Boone. John Lackey. Home teams have a leg up in Games Seven.

But it's not 2004 (and things don't look nearly so hopeless right now as they did back then, either). I don't think the Sox can come back because they've done it before; it's not the laundry that plays the games. Ortiz, Ramirez, Schilling, and Varitek were the only members of that team that have also contributed to this series. (Youkilis was on the bench and could have seen more action, but didn't.)

I'd be crazy to be confident, but I'd have to be a lousy fan to think it's impossible -- not when it's so darn possible. (And I hate to say this, but if there's a team jinxed enough to blow this lead, it's Cleveland.)

This series is not over.

Rambling

2007-10-15T16:30:00.000-04:00

Did I really say the Sox' 3rd and 4th starters are "much better" than Cleveland's? Ah, the confidence that comes from beating up on what's left of the California Angels, as opposed to playing a good team. I really feel bad for Angels fans, if any exist. They were a good team during the regular season, and come playoff time, half their offense gets injured. I like to imagine that I believe in that baseball cliche -- you're not as good as you look when you win, and you're not as bad as you look when you lose. And yet, I fall for he opposite ALL THE TIME. Every four-game winning streak, and suddenly the Red Sox are the best team I've ever seen.

Not only is Cleveland good, they're also a lot of fun. Is there anyone on this team I'm supposed to be rooting against? (I used to hate Kenny Lofton, but I think that's just the pinstriped residue on his uniform.) (And I do hate that hideous, offensive logo.)

And the city of Cleveland -- come on! What a crappy place to be a sports fan! First, they don't have an MLS franchise! Can you imagine?

But (a) the Browns left, (b) the Browns came back, (c) Craig Ehlo, (d) The fumble, (e) The Drive, (f) Pedro's 6 no-hit innings in 1999 ... I mean, now that the Red Sox have won it, there's no fan base that's suffered worse. And at least Red Sox fans had the Celtics winning championships during the 70s and 80s, and got to watch Bobby Orr win a couple, too. What's on the 'Best of Cleveland' video? (I've always been fascinated by the dichotomy of the Celtic fan's arrogance with the pessimism of the Red Sox fan. I mean, these are the same people! And October in New England is a great time and place to be alive! I still don't get it.)

I know that Colorado is becoming the designated fan-favorite (or maybe that's just what Dane Cook's script is telling me), but Cleveland is much more interesting and likeable. And Colorado isn't a small-market team, whatever that means.

Boston is, like, 80 times smaller than everywhere else. The Sox make money because Red Sox *Nation* is so large, passionate, and rich. You, too, could root for a "large market" team if your people cared more about baseball and less about college football and NASCAR. End of story.

(As it happens, I would like to see more revenue sharing along with a salary floor. But if large-market teams like Colorado want to piss away money on Todd Helton, Mike Hampton, and Denny Neagle, and then cry poverty, there's no stopping them. What ticks me off is when teams stop being interested in fielding a major-league roster.)

I like the Sox' chances tonight and in Game Four, mostly because they do well against pitchers who don't strike batters out. Being patient against Carmona paid off huge by knocking him out of the game early. One just can't get Youkilis, Ortiz, and Ramirez (for that matter, Jason Varitek and J.D. Drew) to chase pitches outside the strike zone. My guess is that Westbrook won't last 4 innings tonight. Then again, I have no idea what to expect from Matsuzaka.

Go Sox.

S-M-R-T

2007-10-15T13:01:00.000-04:00

I've made a lot of mistakes in my life. Like that I time I said New Coke was destined to be a hit. Or that Jackie Gutierrez was a slick-fielding shortstop with a great future. Or how the Ford Edsel would save Detroit.

But I'm rather proud of these AL predictions for the 2007 season. Now, I have to admit that I was all wrong about the AL West. Painfully so. But asking if the Yankees had enough starting pitching, and getting excited about Cleveland's young talent (okay, I was technically talking about that third baseman who tanked -- Andy Marte -- and Josh Barfield, and not Carmona), and the Royals WERE fun to watch for the last couple of months ... this is really as close as I ever get to being right. Let me soak it in.

Beating Brandon Webb

2007-10-11T15:30:00.000-04:00

Did you know that Brandon Webb can't handle lefties? It's true.

A WHIP of 1.5 -- roughly Webb's success rate against lefties -- is essentially the same as Baltimore (1.52) or Pittsburgh's entire pitching staff (1.48).

Does Colorado have enough lefties to take advantage? Not particularly. Helton and Hawpe are the lefties in the starting lineup. Holiday, Troy T., and Atkins are righties.

Arizona will win Game One.

Championship predictions

2007-10-11T09:13:00.000-04:00

Guaranteed wrong, or your money back

Boston over Cleveland in 6 or 7. Cleveland is really, really good. But Borowski is not the guy I'd want closing games if I were an Indians fan. Also, Boston's third and fourth starters are much better than Cleveland's. That tends to, you know, matter.

Colorado over Arizona in 5. Arizona isn't good. They aren't. They have Brandon Webb and a very good closer. I liked their third baseman, Whatshisname, enough to have him on my fantasy team for a while. Chris Young is pretty good. But, sheesh. When I whine about the inferiority of the National League, the Diamondbacks are practically Exhibit A. The Twins would beat them in 5, and the Twins finished under .500 in the AL. That's not to say that Colorado stinks. They have a very nice bullpen and good hitters. Troy Palamalu or whatever looks really good to me. (Repeat after me: "If he were playing in New York, blah blah blah ...") This could be a very, very boring series.

Copyright violation

2007-10-11T09:07:00.001-04:00

From a Hill publication, reposted without permission

Witnesses Question Value Of Tax-Funded Sports Stadiums
An estimated $18.5 billion in public money was spent between 1990 and 2006 to build 82 sports facilities that otherwise could have been used to rebuild and repair bridges, roads and other decaying infrastructure, a Harvard professor told a House panel Wednesday.
Of that total, about $16 billion came from tax-exempt bonds that reduce federal tax income, Judith Grant Long, an urban planning professor in Harvard University's Graduate School of Design, told the House Oversight and Government Reform Domestic Policy Subcommittee.
In the second of at least four expected hearings on the value and impact of public financing for sports facilities, Long was one of several witnesses who questioned the practice and policy of using public funds for stadiums.
In breaking down her estimates, Long said projected public spending on stadiums would amount to between $1 billion and $2 billion per year, or about $10 million in each city that has at least one.
Long said her estimates of the total public funding of such facilities were higher than those provided by the sports industry because she added such items as the cost of land on which new stadiums were built, infrastructure improvements and ongoing operating costs.
House Oversight and Government Reform Domestic Policy Subcommittee ranking member Darrell Issa, R-Calif., questioned how significant even $18.5 billion, including federal revenue lost from using tax-exempt bonds, was in a federal budget of $2.9 trillion.
Despite the impact it might have at the federal level, Long argued that it could make a difference locally. "It would go a long way toward ensuring effective management, maintenance and upgrading of local public infrastructure," she said.
Eric Solomon, assistant Treasury secretary for tax policy, testified that the "cost to the government of tax-exempt bonds is significant and growing" and said it "is appropriate to review the tax-exempt bond program to ensure that it is properly targeted."
An attempt was made in the Tax Reform Act of 1986 to halt such use of tax-exempt bonds, he said, but it was not successful.
While such financing was prohibited in one type of tax-exempt bonds -- private bond activity financing -- team owners found they could use government bonds to do the same thing.
Government bonds can be used to build sports stadiums if the state or local government decided they have a public use and are retired by general tax revenues, he said.
As the law now stands, Solomon said, his office is powerless to issue a rule prohibiting tax exempt financing for sports buildings. Any restriction is in Congress' hands, he said.
House Oversight and Government Reform Domestic Policy Subcommittee Chairman Dennis Kucinich, D-Ohio, said his panel will have at least two more hearings on the subject before deciding whether to propose legislation. "The public gets the bills and the owners of the teams get the profits," Kucinich said.
Echoing testimony in the first hearing, Arthur Rolnick, senior vice president and research director of the Federal Reserve Bank in Minneapolis, said "sports owners are very good at playing cities against each other" but the economic effect "is a zero-sum game." By Basil Talbott

I before E, except after C

2007-10-11T09:06:00.000-04:00

"Caffeine."

Discuss.

Let's go, D-Backs!

2007-10-10T10:49:00.000-04:00

Not sure where to pull the quotes out of this article. The whole thing is pretty damn creepy.

"We started to go after character six or seven years ago, but we didn't follow that like we should have," CEO Charlie Monfort says. "I don't want to offend anyone, but I think character-wise we're stronger than anyone in baseball. Christians, and what they've endured, are some of the strongest people in baseball. I believe God sends signs, and we're seeing those."

Sox defeat AAAngels

2007-10-08T09:31:00.000-04:00

Yes, I'm thrilled, and the Sox looked great.

But, with all those injuries to their starting lineup, just about anyone would have swept the Angels.

Predictions

2007-10-03T16:14:00.000-04:00

Fact is, I don't have predictions so much as preferences. I think the Red Sox will beat the Angels and that the Indians will beat the Yankees, but that's also what I want to happen. (I have no idea which version of the Yankees -- I'm think specifically of their starting pitching and defense -- will show up. It's entirely in New York's hands.) And I think the Red Sox will probably beat the Indians, but maybe not.

As I type this, the Phillies-Rockies game is already underway, but I have no idea what's happening in it. I think the Rockies win this series (and I'm rooting for them) and that the Cubs will beat the D-Backs, which would also be my preferred outcome. Anyone who isn't rooting for the Cubs (and doesn't work for the Tribune Companies) has no heart. And if the Cubs can win their first series, they can win another. What they can't do is win the World Series. Not because of any curses -- such things don't exist -- but because they aren't very good.

I'm sure they're selling like hotcakes.

2007-10-02T18:33:00.001-04:00

Why we keep voting Democratic

2007-10-02T10:21:00.000-04:00

Screw you, Senator McCain.

Tonight

2007-10-01T15:41:00.001-04:00

I can't see how Colorado gets past Peavy. That would be a shame, though, since the Padres -- with all their injuries -- would be the worst team in the tournament. And it's been a blast to watch the Rockies make this late-season charge. Seems like it's been (understandably) overlooked, what with the Mets' collapse. What Colorado has done in the past 2 weeks has been unbelievable.

Playoff favorites

2007-10-01T15:29:00.000-04:00

Not who I think will win, but who I want to win.

1. Boston Red Sox
2. Chicago Cubs
3. Cleveland Indians
4. Philadelphia Phillies
5. Colorado Rockies
6. Los Angeles Angels
7. Arizona Diamondbacks
8. San Diego Padres
9. New York Yankees

I think it's safe to say that my preferred order of outcomes has the Red Sox over Chicago (because at least they'd go to the Series), and then no one in particular. There are no dragons to slay in the NL. If the Mets were in it, I'd be secretly rooting for them. Ditto the Dodgers, just so I could look forward to the welcome Grady Little would get at Fenway.

I'd like to see NYY lose to, in order: Boston, Cleveland, Los Angeles, Chicago, Arizona, Philadelphia, Colorado, San Diego. Whatever causes maximum pain. I think that ranks it.

Who do I think will win? Honestly, I have no idea. I like the Sox, but the Indians and Yankees could do some damage. I don't worry about LAA winning, not since the Sox -- I think -- kill John Lackey. Honestly, who knows what version of NYY will show up?

In the NL? I guess you've got to go with the hot hands. But, still, the Cubs seems like the best team standing.

Team Williams

2007-08-30T11:57:00.000-04:00

There are three Hall of Famers named Williams: Billy Williams, the Cubs left fielder in the 1960s and early 70s; Ted Williams of the Red Sox; and Joe Williams, a pitcher with the Kansas City Monarchs.

The following Williamses were All-Stars: Bernie Williams, CF for the Yankees; Davey Williams, who had two nice years playing second base for the New York Giants in the 1950s; Matt Williams, seventeen years (!) playing third base, mostly for the Giants and later Arizona; Mike Williams, a Pirate reliever selected for two All-Star games in the early part of this decade; Mitch Williams, the Wild Thing; Stan Williams -- whose baseball card I once owned for some reason -- a starter-then-reliever who had a nice 1960 at 23 years old and a very nice 1970 at 33 years and otherwise unremarkable; and starting pitcher Woody Williams who, whatever else his flaws, always seem to pitch in the playoffs. Scott Williamson is not eligible.

So what do we have?

SP: Joe Williams
LF: Ted Williams
LF: Billy Williams
CF: Bernie Williams
2B: Davey Williams
3B: Matt Williams
RP: Mike Williams
RP: Mitch Williams
SP: Stan Williams
SP: Woody Williams

Manager Dick Williams (selected over manager Ted Williams, who did a pretty fair job for the Senators/Rangers) moves Billy Williams to RF. Team Williams needs a catcher, a first baseman, and a shortstop.

SP: Joe Williams
C: ?
1B: ?
2B: Davey Williams
3B: Matt Williams
SS: ?
LF: Ted Williams
CF: Bernie Williams
RF: Billy Williams

"Today's baseball stars are all guys named Rodriguez to me."

2007-08-29T17:54:00.000-04:00

So rants Andy Rooney. As it happens, there are lots of Rodriguezes. Lots of Ramirezes, too, which is a name that's easy to confuse with Rodriguez if they're all named Rodriguez to you.

It got me thinking: what's the best All-Time Name Team that could be created?

1B: Rodriguez
2B: Rodriguez
3B: Rodriguez
and so forth.

I don't really want to do the work on this, but I think a squad of Williamses could beat a squad of Rodriguezes or Ramirezes or any other names. Off the top of my head:

LF: Ted Williams
CF: Bernie Williams
3B: Billy Williams
1B: Matt Williams (since 3rd base is taken)
SP: Woody Williams

There are two Hall of Famers named Collins; two Gibsons; two Hubbards (one's an ump); two Jacksons; a Kell, a Kelly, and two Kelleys -- which ought to count for something; four Robinsons (a ha!); two Smiths; and three Williamses.

If I do another post on this, I'll envision one game of Williamses versus Robinsons, winner-take-nothing.

Tony Batista

2007-08-28T16:29:00.000-04:00

By now, you have certainly read reports of Sen. Larry Craig's (R-Idaho) arrest for soliciting anonymous gay sex in the Minneapolis airport. The reporting has been couched in other terms too dull to repeat here, but it's pretty clear what he was doing; he pled guilty to it.

I'd like to spend a moment deconstructing his defense. Quoting CQ.com: According to [the police] report, Craig denied he was trying to proposition the officer and maintained that he used “a wide stance when going to the bathroom and that [the undercover officer's] foot may have touched mine” (emphasis added).

The distance between one's feet, or -- in medical jargon -- "stance," while using a toilet is hemmed in by one's pants, or specifically the largest diameter of one's pants while said pants are dropped around one's ankles. (I'm not sure if the ovular shape of pants lends itself to having a "diameter," per se, but I think the image suffices.) A fatter man would be able to extend his legs further apart than a skinny man, thanks not to his flexibility but because there's a clear relationship between the circumference of one's pants and the maximum diameter of the pants while warming the ankles. And that distance is as far apart as feet may be.

"Ah, yes," I hear you asking, "What if one took off one's pants in order to use the bathroom? Wouldn't that allow for a larger 'stance'?" That's true, but we have no record of Mr. Craig claiming to have removed his pants -- and this would have provided a stronger defense as to what his purpose was that day.

Future disgraced former Senator Craig, looking as his official Senate photo, does not appear to be particularly fat. He can't have an abnormally wide spread, not without removing his pants. If he was able to pull this off, he has an historically wide-open stance. He would be the Tony Batista of dropping a deuce. The story does not hold water.

Great moments in the history of the world

2007-08-21T15:39:00.000-04:00

August 8, 1992: Jack Clark Files for Bankruptcy

JACK CLARK, in the second year of a three-year, $8.7 million contract with the Boston Red Sox, has filed for bankruptcy and listed $6.7 million in debts. "He had some expensive hobbies, and I think they got ahead of him," said FLETCHER A. ROBBE of Long Beach, Calif., the ballplayer's lawyer.

The 36-year-old Clark filed a Chapter 7 bankruptcy petition on July 30 in Santa Ana, Calif. Details of the filing appeared in The Orange County Register yesterday. Clark, batting only .211 and sidelined with shoulder injuries, could not be reached for comment.

Clark, who previously played for San Francisco, St. Louis, the Yankees and San Diego in a career that began in 1975, listed debts of more than $11.4 million and assets of nearly $4.8 million in his filing.

He was also listed as having bought 18 automobiles, including a 1990 Ferrari that cost $717,000 and three 1992 Mercedes Benz cars costing between $103,000 and $143,000. He still owes money on 17 of the automobiles, is liable for about $400,000 in Federal and state taxes and lost about $1 million in the past year in a drag-racing venture, the petition said. (AP)

... incidentally, Jack Clark's ability to waste his $8.7 million pales in comparison to Lou Gorman's ability to waste Jean Yawkey's $8.7 million. At least Jack Clark got a car.

I've never been much for creeds

2007-08-16T13:22:00.000-04:00

This site's motto -- the plural of anecdote is not data -- is tested every time a player switches from the AL to NL. I'm looking at you, Joel Pinero.

If I were an agent, I would have my client sign a one-year deal to play in the NL Central (or pitch in the NL West) and then put him on the market for a huge payday. Fox Sports ranks the top 6 teams in baseball as hailing from the Junior Circuit. Sounds about right to me. But I question their ranking of the Devil Rays as the worst team in baseball. They'd be a touch under .500 in the NL.

Part of me wants to give Jim Bowden credit for what's turning into a pleasant season. And yet, the quality of the opponents is a huge distraction. Kudos to the Braves for bucking the NL trend and trying to make themselves better.

White House predictions, Part II

2007-08-15T12:39:00.000-04:00

In the middle of February, I made my first stab at predicting the nominees of each party. Here's my second round:

Democrats
1. Hillary Clinton
2. John Edwards
3. Barack Obama
4. Bill Richardson
5. Joe Biden
... Moving Hillary to the top means I've succumbed to the conventional wisdom on this race. Bill Richardson is disappointing me.

Republicans
1. Mike Huckabee
2. Mitt Romney
3. Fred Thompson
4. Rudy Guiliani

... Huckabee stays in the lead spot, and Romney is still No. 2. McCain and Brownback have dropped off my list entirely.

... keeping in mind that I predicted the Yankees would fold like umbrellas.

The word "surreal" is tossed around lightly these days

2007-08-13T17:18:00.001-04:00

Who's Next?

2007-08-08T09:41:00.000-04:00

Anti-incumbent sentiment throws out some veterans

... In the Legislature, Erik Fleming, D-Clinton, lost the House seat he was first elected to in 1999, and Senate Finance Committee Chairman Tommy Robertson, R-Moss Point, was trailing 20 points behind his primary opponent. Robertson, who's held the seat since 1992, drew criticism for killing a cigarette tax increase and grocery tax decrease plan.

Watson upsets Robertson
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
By AMBER CRAIG
The Mississippi Press

PASCAGOULA -- Newcomer Michael Watson apparently defeated longtime incumbent state Sen. Tommy Robertson as of 11 p.m. and with 23 of 20 precincts voting. (Ed's note: What the hell?)

Robertson received 2,730 votes, or 39 percent, and Watson had claimed 4,228, or 61 percent. A total of 6,959 people voted in the race.

The winner will face off against Democratic candidate and former Gautier legislator Ray Vecchio in the general election Nov. 6. Vecchio garnered 1,026 votes with 17 of 23 precincts reported.

Votes counts are unofficial.

Watson, a Pascagoula native who practices law for a local defense firm, has said his top priorities include fully funding the Mississippi Adequate Education Program every year, creating more jobs in the state, promoting family values and listening to the needs of the community.

Watson has also said that rebuilding local businesses after Hurricane Katrina should take initial priority over attracting new, out-of-state business.

"I want to work on the businesses we have now," Watson said in a July interview with The Mississippi Press. "I want to build local business first. Then let's worry about bringing in outside business."

Great Moments In The Second Person

2007-07-30T17:28:00.000-04:00

Freeze! D.C. lawmen feud over Gonzo in today's Daily News:

FBI chief Robert Mueller nuked Attorney General Alberto Gonzales in a congressional hearing last week, essentially calling the nation's top lawman a liar.

Since then, a distinctly cold air has settled between FBI headquarters on Pennsylvania Ave. and the main Justice building directly across the street.

"You could open an ice rink between the buildings," one Mueller aide said.

...

I'm almost positive that I could do nothing of the sort. I don't even know where to begin explaining how difficult this would be for me. Hey, at least no one used the word "literally."

WETA on the Gnats

2007-07-30T16:48:00.000-04:00

Marnie and dl004d might be interested in this. Other people who root for the Gnats might be interested, too. People other than me, for example.

Bring it on

2007-07-30T13:53:00.000-04:00

... because sometimes, we get involved in elections.

2130

2007-07-29T21:17:00.000-04:00

Cal Ripken never should have broken Lou Gehrig's record. The right thing to do would have been to take a day off the game before breaking it.

It's not like Gehrig had a sprained ankle or something. He had ALS.

The classy thing to do would have been to let Gehrig keep the record. He was a great player. Deserves his spot in the Hall of Fame. But he's not entitled to that particular record.

Dmitri (Sigh) Young. Part One.

2007-07-27T14:15:00.000-04:00

ITEM: The Washington Nationals are on the verge of announcing a two-year contract extension for first baseman Dmitri Young believed to be worth $10 million over 2 years.

Where to begin?

First, I like Dmitri. It's hard to root against a guy who has come back from alcohol and substance abuse problems, though I'm not ready to look past his violence against women that often gets ignored in discussing his "troubled past." But it's fun to watch a fat guy, particularly one whose career seemed over, succeed. And he's had a fine year.

But he hasn't really had a great year. He made the All-Star team thanks to a silly rule (every team must have one player on the All Star team), and he has a high batting average. Neither of these impress me much. He's only good at one thing: hitting. And he's not great at it. He's good at it. Better than bad. Not great. Good.

...

There are 22 first basemen with enough plate appearances to qualify for the batting title (3.1 plate appearances per game). Dmitri Young has the 9th-highest OPS among them. His 59.6 runs created ranks him 12th. While he has been the bright spot to another dismal Bowden-scripted Nationals season, he's an average first baseman. Average. About half the first basemen in baseball are better than him, and about half are worse. Average.

He's also a terrible fielder. I don't fully trust most fielding stats, but he's got the worst fielding percentage among first basemen. He's also got the worst zone rating. He's got the 3rd-fewest putouts among first basemen. He's also terrible when I've watched him play. He's a terrible first baseman.

The Only Stat That Matters

2007-07-27T10:28:00.000-04:00

Winning Percentage, Washington Nationals
2005: .500
2006: .438
2007: .426

Cliches

2007-07-11T10:29:00.001-04:00

I can't figure out which is more ridiculous: shooting the messenger or the use of a scapegoat.

Either way, I think it's absolutely wonderful that people once did actually shoot messengers for bringing bad news and someone had to come up with the idea NOT to shoot the messenger.

And I wonder if anyone had any guilt over killing a perfectly innocent creature, in this case a goat, over one's sins. Or if they ever used a different animal and some village elder said, "It won't work. It has to be a goat, or the gods will still be angry."

I wonder what it's like to work with me

2007-07-10T15:32:00.000-04:00

Co-worker: There's food in the kitchen.
Me: Any snacks?
C: I think there's grape leaves.
M: No, like cookies. Something sweet.
C: They got middle eastern food for lunch.
M: Then go buy me a cookie.
C: Don't you have an intern for that?
M: My intern buys my cigarettes for me, not food.

Let the Bible Belt Come and Save My Soul

2007-07-10T11:22:00.001-04:00

David Vitter: Promoting Our Shared Louisiana Values. Just ask him. Not like John Kerry, who is out of touch with Louisiana Values. Vitter campaigned on Louisiana Values, you see.

He's focused on the needs of women and families.

Several of them, in fact. Just not necessarily his own.

All-Star Break Predictions

2007-07-09T16:27:00.000-04:00

At the start of the season, I made predictions for the Major and Minor Leagues. Second thoughts? Maybe.

ALE: BOS, TOR, NYY, TB, BAL
- Will Ortiz, Manny, Lugo and Drew start hitting and make this team unbelievable?
- Or will Lowell, Youkilis, Pedroia, and Varitek fall back to lower level and make this team, uh, believable?
- Will NYY collapse like a house of cards, or make a run at the Wild Card? I'm guessing (a).

ALC: CLE, DET, MIN, CWS, KC
- Was I right about the White Sox, or what?

ALW: LAA, OAK, SEA, TEX
- Was I wrong about the Rangers, or what?

Wild Card:
DET
- Or will it be Oakland?
- Can Seattle be a dark horse? I'm saying 'no.'

NLE: NYM, ATL, PHI, FLA, WAS
- What happened to Florida?
- And why do I consistently overrate the Mets?

NLC: CHC, MIL, and some other teams that no one cares about.
- Why the Cubs could overtake the Brewers: because I think the Brewers' offense has been playing over its head.
- Why the Brewers could hold on anyway: way better pitching, and a saner manager.

NLW:
SD, LA, ARI, COL, SF
- Why the Padres will win: Grady Little is managing the other guys

Wild Card:
MIL

World Series:
BOS or DET defeats MIL
(What a cop-out)

Why my co-workers should go on vacation more often

2007-07-09T12:19:00.001-04:00

So help me G-d, I love salt-water taffy.

At CNN, facts are up for a vote

2007-07-05T16:43:00.000-04:00

CNN.com is currently running a poll, "Does your weather seem hotter than normal this summer?"

If only there were some sort of objective way that one could measure temperatures. Oh, well.